i was playing with the iphone yesterday. probably one of the best toys i've played with. mine should be coming sometime next week, hopefully. peanuts make me fart. its terrible i know. its weird when your mom starts talking to you about her sex life. don't worry i didn't let her continue. i raised my hand motioning her to stop. she laughed and said: well i thought we were all adults here. yes we are but i don't want to hear your stories. mom also wondered why she had big knockers but none of her kids does. she told christine that one. maybe it skipped a generation. but i wondered about that phenomenon too.
i was stretching yesterday. i saw where all of my stretch marks were hiding. sneaky bitches.
my alarm threw me out of bed. the alarm said GO WORKOUT FATTY. i just snoozed it.
i hate tuesdays.
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